alqualonde's Diaryland Diary


Just remembered this

So I've had this diary for... 16 years? holy crud. Anyway, its a precious reminder of how far I've come as an individual. I like to think I'm a completely different person now and that in the end everything horrible that happened had a net positive effect on my life through lessons learned. Perhaps... I do know that to this day I still don't trust anyone. I still don't believe most people are capable of empathy. I still know that most men I've met/meet are total misogynists and that most attempts to flatter or impress me are usually huge red flags of a scammer/manipulator. I don't believe people when they compliment me, but that's ok, because I no longer need their validation anyway. I don't believe people who fein wanting to be friends, but that's ok, because being alone actually isn't that bad. I don't need a relationship, but that's ok, because most men I've been with were abusers anyway, starting all the way back in high school up to the present. So I've learned a whole lot about human nature and myself and I'm a lot better off for it, despite all the heartache I experienced when I was younger. High school is a living hell, and if you let it, things do get much better after you graduate. And never hesitate to cut out every single person in your life, even if it means you might be alone for awhile. Because you can focus on yourself and learn to love yourself and then you'll attract the RIGHT people, not the ones you just resorted to being friends with because you were smashed together in a sardine canister known as "high school". Oh, and women will ALWAYS choose sex with men over your friendship. It's just a fact. So don't place your faith in any of them. Learn to take care of yourself so you don't end up a desperate fool like them.

10:40 a.m. - 2019-11-05


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